some natural foreshadowing.

orchids.

white and green orchids will be at my wedding.

perhaps some hydrangeas.

but definitely orchids.

love.

stay tuned..

i know i haven't written in ages.

nerdy.geeky.dorky.

there are so many different places and things to write, and although it's quarter to midnight, and I have school tomorrow, I choose to write on my blog.

Tomorrow is my last day of classes. I've been through and I've learned so much this year. Not just academically, but in my life. I had my biggest pitfall, and I'm still in the process of pulling myself out of that deep hole. but it's safe to say that my fingertips are on the brim of that hole. and I know that once I'm out of it, I'm going to keep learning more about life, myself, and academics.

by the way, i love school.

Exams and painful work aside, I absolutely love learning. and I love learning in an all girls school. I love getting my summer reading list, even if I don't finish all of the required reading. I love learning and understanding concepts that I can use in life, even if it's only one time. I love writing papers. I love learning ways to write and the history of the country and world. I love learning the roots of words and reasoning behind the meanings of English words in Latin. I feel like I'm being taken back to the Roman empire where people would enjoy someone reciting verses of Cicero at a party. Sometimes I wish that was still active today. I love having class discussions and debates in religion class. I love having my faith put to the test. I've never felt so much growth in myself in just a forty-minute class period. I love learning about the body and its functions. I love being pushed in school, to force myself to know information that will help me in the future.

as much as I love summer, I'm ready for school next fall. I'm actually excited.

Am I a dork?

if a dork is simply someone who enjoys learning in school, then...

chyeah.

very much so.

distance and time: alicia keys

"no matter how far you are

no matter how long it takes him

through distance and time

I'll be waiting."

hmph.

dreamy.

Mila

came across this little number in the archives of the computer.

this is the essay i submitted to merion as a part of my application.

the question was to describe an experience that changed my life.

..also it's been raining and storming all day. smiles to extremes.

..speaking of smiles to extremes...skyped with lj and kaylie in hong kong today.

:D

Summer of 2007 will never escape my mind. Boarding the plane from Hawaii to Tonga was not the only adventure I was in for as my family and me soared over endless blue seas to the islands of my heritage. As the miniscule plane came to a turbulent stop on a dirt runway, the humble circumstances of the Tongan islands became evident instantly. No matter how much Dad tried to prepare us kids for the cultural experiences we would have, he would never be able to foreshadow the unforgettable memory waiting for me.

Her name is Naemila. She told me to call her Mila in her broken English. Riding in the bed of a rusty pickup truck to my uncle’s tiny worn-down home, I met Mila at the doorstep as she took our bags. The next morning, I woke up to Mila motioning me to come with her to somewhere I did not know, and my parents were surprisingly excited for me to leave with someone practically a stranger. Mila and I walked for miles to beautiful beaches unknown to earth. We picked up breakfast from a cousin of hers who was climbing trees and gathering coconuts as a part of his daily routine. We walked to a beach with a colossal cave that looked out to the vast ocean and horizon. As we gazed at the skyline I realized how small I was compared to the world. Mila expressed to me how thankful she was to have a friend like me, a friend who could barely understand her English, yet know her intentions to be a daughter of God. Mila was very religious, and knew how fortunate she was to have what she did, which was very little. She and I spent everyday together as she showed me the paradise in which she lived. I learned that paradise for her was food, clothing, and a place to sleep, and obtaining happiness only took a glance at the horizon.

e ku'u morning dew

there's something about him that i simply just cant get enough of,

and frankly,

i think that "something" has turned into many things.

maybe it's the way he looks at me.

whether he's teasing, or serious.

maybe it's the way we laugh together.

or perhaps when we play piano together.

like a duet, almost.

maybe it's the way he smells good 24/7.

literally.

or maybe it's our taste in music.

the way we sing the o'jays and michael jackson

and earth, wind, and fire on car rides.

maybe it's the "good morning lana" texts i get.

i love those.

or could it be when he holds my hand?

perhaps.

i think it's a combination of all these things that just makes me crazy about him.

maybe that's the reason why i repeat his name over and over again in my mind..

just so i can smile if i'm ever feeling upset.

perhaps my memories of our dates is the reason why his name is doodled in my notebooks, complemented with a heart or two, of course.

i've become less and less bothered by the people

who tease me for this relationship..

in which are reasons i am unsure.

i think i've got it.

it's the way he treats me.

he treats me like i'm of royalty.

i feel like i don't deserve it.

and i really don't.

but he doesn't let me think that.

i try my best to be as good to him as he is to me.

and to be as good as him in general,

regardless of our relationship.

i've been holding a lot of this in, but now that we're down to a

monthly/weekly/daily

countdown until he leaves,

i feel the need to let these thoughts and feelings loose.

so here i am...unchaining these thoughts from the center of my mind

and putting them on a blog.

for everyone capable to read.

but it's all true.

he gives me more than he knows.

whether he's aware of it or not, it's true.

i promise.

Neverland Loving

I was never a Peter Pan fan, but

I think I've found Neverland.

After track practice, Bridget and I walked through an unknown park across the street from school.

We talked about relationships and parenting.

The essence and blooming of spring was captured in the few minutes we spent strolling through it.

Butterflies were floating,

trees were dancing,

grass was growing,

flowers were blooming.

Kids were laughing with Mommy and Daddy.

Dogs were kissing their owners who held slobber-drenched frisbees.

A hand-holding, elderly couple strolled by Bridget and I as we were running and said hello, smiling.

Reasonably sized, rustic homes bordered the cobblestone street with old ladies drinking tea and knitting baby clothes for granddaughters.

They look up through highly prescribed glasses and smile their cute smiles.

Young couples occupy Neverland too.

The Mrs. places one hand on her pregnant stomach, as the Mr. holds her other hand.

And they walk together.

Little girls were climbing trees, telling secrets,

as the little boy was trying to listen to them.

He steals a glance at the one with the brown curly pigtails

who gives him butterflies in his tummy, similar to the

butterflies fluttering around her.

Kites were being flown by daughters and fathers.

BoyfriendandGirlfriend

were cuddling on a blanket

looking at the clouds.

Suddenly...

drops of water.

Thin, silver streams of rain darted to the green grass.

And the little girls and boys

and their mommys and daddies

laughed

and

danced.

So it's true.

Neverland really does exist, everyone.

Bring it on home.

unworthy of facebook.

...oh spring break. you treated me so well.

boy, you so fine.